Let's try this again

 I have thought about trying to write again for awhile but I just haven't been in the right mind set to give it a go, it's been so long since I have been here seems like years. I am struggling right now with depression and I am so exhausted all the time, but everyone now a days is struggling with something, especially with covid, I am terrified all the time, I go to get grocery's and when I get home I want to pour bleach all over me lol but I don't of course but don't think that I haven't thought about it. I try to keep my mind off of things but it's hard when all you hear or read is about the virus, everyone has an opinion but no one seems to know what the hell they are talking about, so I stay away from just about everyone. My husband just got out of the hospital because of pneumonia and a fungal infection in his lungs, was in there for a week, seemed like a lot longer but that's cause I was so full of anxiety having him gone, then he comes home and two days later we are pissing each other off hahahahahaha back to normal around here. So much has happened since I last wrote, maybe I will try and write it all down but for today I think this is a good start, sure hope everyone is doing well and staying safe, will try and come back tomorrow and write more and who knows maybe I will get back in the swing of things again till then  take care....

Some Bunny Luv's You: No Excuses

Some Bunny Luv's You: No Excuses: It's been so long since I wrote, I wish I could say it's because I was having an exciting adventure but alas nope just regular life ...

No Excuses

It's been so long since I wrote, I wish I could say it's because I was having an exciting adventure but alas nope just regular life with regular problems. I guess I have been hiding again it's not that I am depressed or angry I think I have been numb, after all that happened with my hubby, I just kind of went into a funk. I just didn't feel well anything oh sure I laughed and I cried but mostly I sat and got lost inside myself, I think I just needed to protect myself maybe my body knew I was sinking and just hung on to the edge for awhile and you know what I'm good with that. Today as of two min before coming here I guess I decided it is time to wake up again, oh I didn't just sit around I worked in my garden, built a cat run, built a new dove cage, extended the rabbit pen and purged about ten boxes of stuff, so I have been busy not sure why I feel like I was in a funk but I just do lol, a very productive funk. One thing that has been fantastic is I have had many visits with family well my nephew and niece but that's family is it not lol, it's been amazing to talk and visit what a blessing, I noticed that when they come to visit I can't stop talking hahahahaha I think I have craved family more than I even knew, it's hard when you can't travel and depend on people coming to see you, i don't complain about it cause I know everyone has things going on in there life but I sure do miss everyone. There is a family reunion next year and I am trying to figure out how I can get to it we will have to save up and either rent or borrow a camper van, something that has a bathroom in it to keep my anxiety away cause if I have a toilet along with me I won't panic about what if I need a bathroom cause just that will keep me from going, isn't that sad, but that is me and I either deal with it or go crazy trying to accept who I am. Well I am tired and Dean just woke up to get ready for work, he is working graveyard again, hate it but it is an easier shift for him so I keep my mouth shut and just make the cat sleep with me hahahahaha, who am I fooling she sleeps with whoever she damn well pleases hahahahha.