Welcome to Spring Yippiii

I am so excited the last two days have been so nice I have spent almost all day outside, just feels so good to have fresh air and sunshine just amazing. I have spent the last three days working on our co-op's shed, I decided this year I am not fighting with everyone putting tools back were they belong so I went to the dollar store and purchased a bunch of tool brackets, what a great deal you get 5 brackets with hardware for $1.25  I mean how crazy is that, so the first day I had to move all the lawn mowers out now that may sound silly cause usually people only have one or two, well not us we have three electric for personal yards, two smaller gas, one industrial Toro and the best one of all my riding lawn tractor, so the first hour I spent moving crap out of the way, vacuumed up all the mice crap, not a fun job there and sweeping the floor of grass and nails and screws that people have dropped and just not picket up. Then I got my drill and started hanging stuff, omg what fun I had, I am a tool girl I love all kinds of pruners and snipers, rakes heavy duty and light duty, I myself have a table saw,chop saw, grinder, drill press and way to much of the smaller tools to write, I am not sure were I got this love of building I was never taught just started to learn how to do stuff because both my first hubby and my current hubby have no experience at all can hardly use a hammer lol, so if I want stuff done I have to do it myself, now if it is a big project I have a couple friends that will come and lend a hand but I usually attempt to do it myself first. So I got half the shed done after two days of about 4 hours or more work and I had to stop because I need more brackets and was to tired to go to the store so maybe tomorrow. There is nothing that makes me angrier then someone taking stuff out of the shed and when they return it they open the door and put it in the corner and leave, last year I had to clean the shed three times just to get the lawn tractor out to mow, after the third time I wrote a notice and told everyone that if they don't keep the shed tidy grounds will put a new lock on and no one else will be able to go in, that seemed to help till the end of the season then it's back to a mess. I mean come on I am not dealing with children you have to be over twelve years old to go into the shed and use things, no this is adults who most are in there forties, just no respect for anyone or anything, so this year I hope will be much better instead of things hanging on nails everything will have it's spot and easy to see the tools you need and where they get put back, I am almost thinking of putting signs above the racks so people now were to put things back, shouldn't be to hard I am sure there are coloring book pages I could use. Kind of sounds ridiculous but that is what we live with here and I for one have had enough, they get one more chance and after that what will happen is everyone will have to purchase there own tools and lawn mowers and the co-op will stop buying them for all to use. I wish I could say that I have slept good after all that work but it is the opposite again, another reason I didn't want to drive to the store not on two hours of sleep, so tonight I am biting the bullet and taking a sleeping pill, I hate to take them but if I have one more night of no sleep then things will get very bad I walk into things, cant speak, start to say things backwards and just over all feel like I have been hit by a bus so this girl is going to sleep tonight even if it kills her hahahaha....

What an idiot I can be lmao

This morning I learned the same old rule that I should not eat peanuts hahahahaha, my poor gut is churning and I feel like I have a hangover not a good feeling but as they say life goes on and soon I think it will flow very fast out of me hahahahahaha what an idiot I know better but they just looked so good, I am talking about the elephant peanuts in the shell you know the ones that I think every kid comes home on trick or treat and gives them all to there parents, I love that time of the year lol. Today I have plans that I hope I can get done, first I need to clean the bird cages in the house my finches and my love bird had baths yesterday so today I need to clean up the mess they made, then I need to go trim rabbit nails they shouldn't be to bad cause I just did them when I moved them outside, I like to check after they have been out for a month make sure there isn't any damage while they fist go crazy with the space and try and rip up everything hahahaha. I am trying to find some poles to place around my yard that I can just attach wire to on the days that are good for them to come out and run around, if I can't find what I want I might just put chicken wire all around the bottom of my fence and just let them out, I of course will worry like crazy the first few times they come out I always worry about the hawks and owls that hang around my place, if I could net in my yard I would let them run the yard all day and night but don't think my neighbors would like that, and I don't want to push my luck because they are supposed to be in there barn all the time but also no one cares in the co-op because I keep them so clean and tidy so it's not who lives in the co-op it's the people around us. Hubby just got home from work he is in a good mood today, I know how his day has been as soon as he opens the door, if he walks in saying hello and Jimmy our lovebird calls to him he will say hi Jim that's when I know he has had a good day, if he walks in and goes directly to the bathroom or his office/play room I know to stay away for at least and hour hahahaha. I was so hoping it was going to be a sunny day today but it is cloudy and looks cold so I think I will put off doing some more pruning of tree's till another day, I already did four of the plumb tree's I do every spring, no one touches them but me and everyone know to keep there fingers off lol, I am a self taught pruner from watching videos and talking to other who have done it and in the last two years I have managed to bring back two plumb trees back to producing fruit so no touchy I tell ya, I have two more large plumb trees to prune and two apricot trees, some of the apricot limbs I will be getting help with because they need to be chainsawed off, I could do it but I don't trust myself to use a chainsaw while standing on a ladder anymore just to scary for me so I pass on that part to a neighbor. It's funny cause I love pruning the trees the first four I do I don't even have to have a ladder I have cut them now so I can reach everything with just an extender pruner, so much better for the fruit also because everyone can reach to pick the fruit and we don't count on getting to much at least not from the bottom layer because the kids manage to eat most of them, that's fine we have the two big trees to pick from and what is sad is there is only a few of us that pick the fruit, well kind of sad and kind of not because that means the rest of us that love it get so much it lasts us a season. I have a bit more books to sort out and my office is almost done, I have three printers the one I use is just a black and white ink no color so I use that one all the time and the other ones I have kept because friends gave them to me but I think I will get rid of the other two and splurge and get myself a scanner this year, I have a secret and not many people know this about me but I have a bad habit that I have not been able to rid of and that is,,,,,I love to take things apart lol I do I have taken tv's vcr's computers and probably will take apart one of the printers because it doesn't work just the scanner works and it is so old no one will want to fix it cheaper to just go buy one, so there ya go another secret I have shared, see I take it all apart and keep all the screws and washers and anything else I think I will use later on, my hubby thinks I am silly but I haven't had to buy screws for almost anything I make cause I have what I need, just if I need large screws then I have to buy some, I tell him I am saving money but to be honest I just like to rip things apart hahahahaha, okay I have sat long enough time to get this day going, I think it just might be a good one.......😎

Something is wrong

Something is wrong and I am not sure what it is I just feel off, I don't want to play games or write in my book or even sit and watch a show, I have a bit of tremors and my head hurts a bit, kind of when I know a storm is on it's way the pressure in my head is horrible. Yesterday I couldn't eat much I slept most of the day and today I could go sleep again but I am trying to fight it, I am a bit stressed and my nerves are on edge so just not a good day for me. It's a bit windy out but the sun is out and I don't even want to go outside I hate it when I feel like this but at least I know it doesn't last usually a couple days and I feel better, I wonder if this is part of menopause? I have noticed that in the last couple days I have had a hard time finding words it's frustrating as heck. Sooo it's been a few days since I wrote this and all I can do is laugh about it cause today was a great day, went to town and got dinner, worked on my book and now I am taking a break for a few minutes then I am going back to sorting books again. Yesterday well wait let me start by saying last two Sunday's I have gone to a friends house and cleaned because they sold the house the first day I worked for about 7 hours not full speed that's what I like about who I was cleaning for I can take as much time as I want and not feel like I have to rush through it all, came home and for the next two days I did nothing hahahahaha I was so sore and tired but a good sore, you always feel good after helping friends out, love that I can do something nice for them this time, the next cleaning day went way faster I think I only worked for about three hours not even could have been two, I was glad I had done so much the first trip cause I was not doing so well on the second trip, I hadn't slept all night tossed and turned all night and I woke up with a headache and sore guts so just getting to the house was a chore let alone cleaning but I got it done and felt so great about it when I got home I had a hot bath and started to feel better, sometimes I can talk myself out of anxiety and that day I managed to do it. A couple days later my friend stopped over and dropped off four large bookcases for me, I was so excited I couldn't wait to fill them up, I have had a lot of my books in dressers for a few years but now I have most of them sorted and on the shelves, love that my Stephen king is back out on display, I even had one case put in my office area and now I am sorting and filing stuff I will have way more room in here and I can't say thank you enough. I was asked how much I was going to charge for cleaning but I told them they are not paying me this time because I needed my license paid this year and it's about $80.00, not a big deal but I didn't have the money to spend at the time so they paid for it because they wanted me to drive there extra car so I could help pack up the house and get ready for the move so I said with them paying the bill and the bookshelves that was payment more then enough, plus with all the help they give me it felt so wonderful to be able to pay them back, it's funny because they said well we were going to ask you to clean a bit at there other house and I said for sure just let me know what you need and when but you will have to pay me for that work I will need some dollar store money by then hahahahahahaha. I am still waiting on my other friend who is going with me to get my new computer, hoping sometime next week will work for him but it's not a big deal cause I still have this one to use till I get it but I sure am getting excited to see what I will be getting. Well I guess I have had enough of a break better get back to sorting, so far I have done three hours of sorting and filing all our books because my hubby has a huge amount close to three hundred books I am sure but will be so great to have it done and have the extra space, not sure what I am doing with the dressers yet but I am sure I will figure something out......

Take a deep breath and carry on

In all my long life I have heard some horrible things said to me about my weight, my choices in life, my abuse I am surviving with and others but today was the icing on the cake, you see I was down town and a lady was walking with her child and he darted out on the road the mom being scared and upset grabbed the kid by the arm and pulled him off the road now I agree that she did grab his arm and jerked him maybe a bit to hard but I also know how she was feeling at that moment when this happened and just how scared it was for her to have him do that so I understood but this lady who was standing by me blurts out just loud enough for me to hear that people like her are why others abuse people, because an abused person will always turn around and abuse others, I stood there with I am sure my jaw held open I couldn't believe that anyone in this day and age could be so ignorant and spit out these foul words and feel totally fine with it, this person who I have never seen before doesn't know who I am has no idea who she made this comment to I have never wanted to slap someone in the face as much as I did her. This week has been one of the hardest weeks I have had because of a person who lives by me is causing so much trouble for everyone, I have always been so proud of the place I live and proud of my neighbors with all that they have done to better all of our lives here and I guess it's just like what they say that there is always a bad apple in the bunch. I don't know what to do I am at a loss I have so much anger and frustration towards them, every time I do something that I have been asked to do for the co-op I get a negative remark from this person so much so that I just want to stop volunteering my time and that is so sad. I have done so much for this person in the last two years because that is the kind of person I am if there is a need and I can fill it I am there, but how much do I have to endure before it's to much. There are some plans in effect and I try to keep my mind focusing on that and patience is not my strong suit for sure but I am trying. It's so hard for me to take the things that have been said without spitting foul words back at them, I don't want to be that kind of person so I hang on for my life and I guess really I have two ways to deal with it all, I can walk away and leave all the work I do to my neighbors and put more jobs on there back or I can keep my mouth shut and hope and pray that soon things will change and we will move on to a happier place, I don't answer to this person even though they think that all of us should, the jobs I have been asked to do have been from the group of us and I am not here to impress this person so for the time being I will try my hardest to keep my mouth shut do my job and well like Dora says just keep swimming just keep swimming.........

Snow snow go away come again another never!!!!!!!! well till next fall

I am having a bitchy and tired day because I am broken again for 5 days hahahahaha  that's what a friend of mine her hubby says we are broken on our period and I kind of like it. I should have known it was coming because I started to clean the house and shift things around nesting they call it, I don't mind it gets the floors clean more often plus I got a new mop from the dollar store and had to try it out and I like it very easy to ring out by hand cause I don't have a bucket ringer my last one broke and I haven't bothered to get a new one. Bedroom smells loverly with wood soap but sneezing a bit probably from the dust being picket up. I want to see if I can get my office floor done also but first I have to clean up the mess I made sorting, I have way to much stuff and I keep thinking I will get rid of some but then I keep finding places for everything lol, I have a paper hoard that started from my neighbor and friends, they had garage sales and what they didn't get rid of they dropped off at my door, I like the fancy computer paper but I have about ten packages of writing paper that have 350 sheets in each, I have been thinking about getting rid of at least 5 and I came up with a good idea, a friend of mine stays in Mexico for the winter and then comes home for the summer months well her boyfriend is flying out and will be driving back with her soon, so I am going to see if he can take a few with him for the kids there because they don't have a lot of stuff in the area that she lives plus I have some coloring books and notebooks I can send I even have a bunch of crayons will have to ask about them cause they are not in great shape but I bet the kids wouldn't mind. From the title you can guess it is snowing again I'm not to worried rain is coming again so I don't think it will be staying long but i tell ya I am getting tired of cleaning the inside of the house I want to get the outside started but patients is not something  I have very much of. I am missing my mom today she has been on my mind a lot this last week it's that time of the year I always think of her in the spring she has been gone since 1989 and I have forgotten her voice except at times when I say or laugh about something and I can hear here seems like the older I get the more I seem to be like her, that makes me very happy. Well I better get back at it before sitting gets to comfortable hubby will be home soon so make early supper and then I can sit for a bit and relax, laundry is ready for dryer also, so far I have gotten a lot done today I should be bitchy more often just think what I would get done lol......

Spitting Vile Mad !!!!

You know those days when you wake up and even before you open your eyes you just know you are mad, is it because of a dream or lack of sleep you just don't know why it is what it is, well today is one of those days. I can blame it on a few things like the fact that I ate to much yesterday and now today I am paying for it big time and can't go to far from the bathroom my poor aching butt, or that I got four hours of sleep and I am bitchy and tired, oh then there is the fact that I took the garbage out yesterday and saw that our garbage bin was upgraded to a larger one, now I know you are wondering what the hell that is about, see I am head of grounds were we live and as head of grounds I am to be informed about anything changing that has to do with grounds and once again I was not told, now you think big deal a bigger bin more room and that is true but what pisses me off is our committee had a plan for the recycling and garbage to be put back together and moved and now that can't happen because the bins are to big so now I have to come up with another plan and I will but damn it there is nothing I hate more then someone going behind our backs and changing things without asking permission, I had the same thing happen to us last year, I can't go into it on here but the response I got back to me is it's easier to ask forgiveness then permission, well that was the wrong thing to say to me pissed me off for months hahaahahaha. There are some changes going to happen around here very soon and as much as I am looking forward to them happening I am also stressed about it because I know a certain person is not going to be happy at all and could possibly make life uncomfortable for a while living here but it has to be done so I will just have to suck it up and deal with what happens but I don't have to like it hahahahaha. The good news is almost all the snow that fell the other day is gone again but and this is a big but they are calling for more snow this week arrrgggggg what can you do, not a hell of a lot for some reason I don't have a wand I can use to change the weather when I want, I know, someone forgot to inform who ever is in charge that I was to get a wand so now I have to sit and wait for spring like I am some normal person and it sucks 😏.  I got our income tax done and sent off another good year return I can't wait for this year before we get anything else I am getting a new computer, I was supposed to get one last year but I has mine fixed so we used the money for other things then 4 months later the computer's motherboard died, just figured thank goodness a very good friend of mine gave me a computer to get me through till I get my new one. My computer guy is going with me to shop for what I need I trust him with my life him and his wife are the best kind of friends you can ever have. We are very blessed with the friends we have, such good people just make life so much interesting and fun. For the most part we have a bit of bartering between us, I cut there hair for free and they help with computer and car stuff for us, it's a great help I think I get the better deal but they tell me we are all even. Well I think I will try and watch a show for a bit and maybe try and eat some soup broth it's a chance to try but I am hungry and I am not going anywhere today, it's a good thing we have two bathrooms in this house .......

You have got to be kidding me!!!!!!!!

Snow damn it snow again and it's snowing right now it's a winter wonderland out there again, it looks pretty but what the hell !!!!!  someone is playing a horrible trick on me and I am not impressed, I was just getting ready to clean up the garden there was only a small amount of snow left that hadn't melted and now it's all gone to hell in a basket out there lol. For some reason when I woke up and saw it was snowing and that the ground has a couple inches already all I could do is laugh my hubby was watching to see if I started to cry or not poor guy has been through a long and worrisome winter with me because of my depression and anxiety and S.A.D.  but what the hell can you do sometimes you just have to laugh oh sure I was mad as heck but I am trying to look on the good side of this, like at least we will have lots of water this year, this will mean I spend more time cleaning and sorting the house out, I can have more time for writing, oh who I am I kidding all I can say is CRAP ON A CRACKER!!!!!!!! ty bang theory lol. I had plans to go to the dollar store today and now I am thinking maybe I should stay home because you just know that there is going to be idiots ou ton the road who have forgotten how to drive in snow again, just not worth the anger and anxiety they give me not for the dollar store lol  oh well maybe tomorrow you know when I wake up and all of this is just a rude dream and the yard will be all melted and warm just right for me to start working in the garden and I can laugh and laugh at myself for thinking it snowed again, well okay I can dream can't I hahahahaha.