Not such a great day

Well I wish I could say everything is great but not today, I have been having a hard time sleeping again and last night was horrible, I can't even say what time I finally got to sleep on the couch but this morning I woke up with a headache and stiff neck and my mouth feel like I need to scrap it off lol, you know when you feel like you have a layer of scum man I hate that, so first thing I took a pain killer and things have settled down a bit but I must say that I have the blues today, it's been awhile since I woke up and felt like this, it's one of those days when you know you are going to have to struggle through the day and probably not be happy with how you did but you have to fight and struggle through even though I would like to just curl up in bed and sleep the day away. I know it's going to be a crappy day because my hubby yelled at me from down stairs and says you see what time it is?  I'm like what the hell do I care what time it is piss off hahahahaha, some days I have such a poor attitude right from the second I wake up and for no good reason I know it's just my manic showing so I try to keep my mouth shut for fear of what will come out lol. This may sound silly to some but it's a colder day today looks like rain and a chill is in the air so I rushed to do a small load of laundry just so I could run the dryer hahahaha  I don't know why but the heat from the dryer makes my hands feel less sore, growing up I used to watch my mom do these wax treatments for her hands and every now and then she would let me join her for fun, well now that my hands are starting to curl and be sore on wet days like this I sure could use a wax treatment about now, I used to have a hand wax but I gave it to a friend cause I never used it might have to see if she isn't using it and get it back for days like this. Dean is making pancakes guess he got tired of waiting on me, today is not a day I can eat early just smelling it is making me feel ill but this to will pass. I have been trying very hard to keep stress down, been working in the garden and yard and I even read a book something I haven't done for about a year and for the most part I have done well but a few things have pushed there way into my life. There are a few things happening at our co-op that is very stressful and makes day to day things harder to deal with, when you are a person like me who can't stand anyone not liking me or don't want to hurt any ones feelings life can be difficult to say the least kind of the reason I do keep to myself a lot of the time, as I get older I have a harder time dealing with conflict and it effects me for a longer period of time, when you live in a place with 14 unit's close together of course there will be conflicts from time to time and even some as hard as they are for me to deal with end in a positive note in the end, sometimes just airing out junk is helpful, but when there is as I like to say to many cooks in the kitchen it can be maddening, frustrating and down right pissy to deal with, I never want to say anything to hurt anyone so I tend to keep quiet most of the time but there are times when I feel so passionately about a subject that I just have to speak up and right now I am going through just that kind of thing, there is a person I will not name but this person has sometimes a very strong personality and is in my opinion a bit overbearing at times and we tend to rut heads together from time to time but I found in the past few weeks that I have had to stand up for this person for the work being done for the co-op and being scrutinized by others for the work that has been done and because I felt strongly about my opinion some have said I am this persons advocate even though at times they have spoken some not so nice things about me, so right now I don't feel very grown up at all I feel like I am in pre school again picking which friend I want and which friend I will ignore for the week and at my age this frustrates me so much, I think I am most of the time able to carry myself with dignity and grace and feel pretty good at how I handle myself but in this last few weeks I feel like I am a grade teacher or a therapist trying to guide some adults from a immature place back to adult hood and it's exhausting hahahahahaha, So for today I think I will curl up with a book put on my warm slippers maybe have some hot tea heck I might even put some vics on just for the aroma effect and just hide in my own world for a few hours and be my own therapist for the day, yup that sounds like a terrific day now all I have to do is convince my hubby in to letting me get away with it hahahahaha well I can try nothing wrong with trying and who knows maybe I will get my way this time hahahahaha.