Were is my damn snow?

Come on it's almost the first and no snow yet, I hate the stuff on road and sidewalks but we need some for the kids to play in, some of my favorite times has been playing in snow, every year I struggle with depression at this time and you would think snow would be the set off to a bad state for me but nope I  am like a little kid as it is coming down, rain and snow is my favorite thing to walk in as long as it isn't to cold I don't like icicles in my nose hahahahahaha. Today I am listening to Xmas songs, I did manage to decorate a bit the last 2 nights didn't do to much because I can't find all my stuff I think my kid took a bunch with her or I may have given a lot away when I was having a bad time who knows all I know is I have squat to use anymore lol. I am thinking after the season is done I will see if anyone has some decorations they don't need, I might even try and make a few see how my moods go, sewing at this time is not always the best idea for me. So hubby calls me to make dinner so off I go it's easy just hamburger mashed potatoes and cram of mushroom soup so I am like thank god because I just spent 2 hours cleaning the kitchen and I am tired, well I guess when I went to stir the pot of hamburger I must have caught the switch with my shirt and turned it up to full so by the time I got back to the kitchen from the bathroom I could smell something and not a good thing hahahahaha good thing I showed up when I did so I could transfer most of the meat to another pot before burning all of it, it turned out good thank god but now I have a mess to clean up again hahaha  it never ends. I went and got a few food things today we only had 40 bucks for 2 weeks of food so going to be a lot of potatoes this week, thank god a friend of mine gave us some meat so we have a bit to get us through, plus I tried my bread maker out and made some bread that is so good, tomorrow I am going to try and make some buns, hubby wants some cinnamon buns so we shall see if he is good enough to earn them or not lol. I can tell it is 7pm cause I can hardly keep my eyes open ohhhh last night about 6:30pm I decided to go for a hot bath I just get in and relax and hubby comes in and says come to bed so I say okay I will try, then he says to me is the water hot? I'm like well ya I just filled the tub he says oh good I want to soak for a bit then get to bed after you have warmed it up hahahaha what an ass  so i go to bed sleep for about 15 min then I am awake again and get up and he heads to bed and says hey get to bed lol sorry hunny I am awake now and will be till probably 2am and yup I was. I am having trouble sleeping in our bed every time I climb in I still wait for our cat to come to bed so I have been sleeping on the couch, its comfortable but I do miss sleeping in a bed going to try tonight again I know I will get passed this it will just take some time but I have to admit I have looked at a few kitten pics lol, I wish I could have a share kitty like I did with my neighbor they fed and had litter for her and she just came and visited with me during the day or any time I was in the back yard, oh well I am still not ready to have another cat, everyone keeps telling me to get a dog and I would love to have a dog but if I can't afford a cat how can we afford a dog, I am considering looking into fostering a dog that way I don't have to pay for food and stuff just give it a loving home till it is adopted but if I get attached like I always do then I am stuck going through loss again so I think I will just keep going with my rabbit's and birds, I get a lot of love from them or at least they tolerate me hahahahahaha. Well I think I will go get ready for bed, tomorrow my plan is to work on my book till noon then maybe make some buns and clean the kitchen floor well that is the plan but things have a way of changing around here as fast as my moods take me....